One-Line Philosopher: Top 10 thoughts of the week

Dave Weinbaum


10. Acts of freedom grant us the freedom to act.

9. A hive of bees tried to pollinate my rock garden. It took me a week to clean up the bodies.

8. When expenses are fixed, inflation is boon.

7. I called the suicide hot line. No one answered. Maybe next time I’ll use the phone.

6. Rehearsal is what makes your performance seem stunningly unrehearsed.

5. Lighting is drawn to clouds with silver linings.

4. I invented the tail clapper for beavers. I call it “Bark on-Bark off!”

3. If we fired screw-ups by priority, Congress would be first to go.

2. The fastest way to get a patriot’s attention is to take away his freedom.

1. Intelligence isn’t in how well we read or spell, but how we relate to history.

Click here to comment for local opinion