|Hip Hop Barack and our new constitution
|Posted: Thursday, May 21, 2009 5:12 pm
“There was a dream that was Rome. You could only whisper it. Anything more than a whisper and it would vanish ...”
It’s no surprise our new president has changed America in the image of his heroes: Nation of Islam Minister Louis Farrakhan, the Rev. Jeremiah Wright and Father Pflager. Despite his denials of their influence on him, these America-haters have a friend in the White House.
The “USA is evil” mantra was an obvious lead-in to the overthrow of our constitutional laws, capitalism and the ability of other governmental institutions to balance power that was to prevent a king from taking over.
Well, it seems the Prince of Hyde Park has crowned himself the King of America. Needless to say the “change” promised has already altered our Bill of Rights:
• Amendment 1: Freedom FROM Religion and the Right Wing Press. If one MUST pray he/she needs do it in private so as not to offend those who consider prayer to be unnecessary babble and an affront. Congress will not abridge the freedom of speech of ACORN, any union, main-stream press or any other media not subject to liberal scorn or kidney failure.
• Amendment 2: Michelle has the sole right to bare arms. All the rest of you right-wing nut-jobs must give up your guns and turn in your ammo. As to militias? Fugehaboutit! ACORN will be replacing the National Guard and from this day forward be known as The Royal Barack Brigade.
• Amendment 3: Quartering of soldiers. No soldier shall be quartered in any house unless members of the Royal Brigade for the purpose of stopping mean banks trying to recover the former property of a King Obama supporter just because they refused to make their mortgage payments.
• Amendment 4: Search and Seizure. King Barack will have the right to search and his subjects will have the right to have seizures.
• Amendment 5: Trial and Punishment. No person shall be held for a crime without due process, unless that person is a known vicious terrorist. Said terrorist shall be released in the USA population in the hopes that the King’s magnificence will temper their behavior. Needless to say, he will be shackled by ankle-bracelet and given a severe shock if he gets within 2,000 miles of the King.
• Amendment 6: Right to a Speedy Trial except for CEOs of businesses that King Obama has or is in the process of taking over. CEOs shall obey without question the King’s orders to screw owners out of their contracted shares in favor of any union the King shall choose. Punishment will include the ruination of anyone by the White House press corps, a.k.a., the King’s Krack Korrespondents or KKK.
• Amendment 7: Trial by Jury in Civil Cases ... unless you are a supporter of the King. Then he shall provide you with a judge of his peers.
• Amendment 8: Excessive bail shall not be required, nor excessive fines imposed, nor cruel and unusual punishments inflicted, unless you’re a greedy Wall Street punk who didn’t support the King. Then you’ll be subject to buses full of the King’s Brigade delivered to your doorstep to demonstrate.
• Amendment 9: These rights shall not be construed to deny or disparage others retained by the people as long as they’re not affiliated with any Republican, conservative, or any doctor capable of preventing a certain talk show host’s kidney failure.
• Amendment 10: Powers of the States and People. The powers delegated to the United States by the constitution are reserved to the states respectively, or to the people. Of course, by the 200th day of King Obama’s first year of his lifetime election, the above will be completely moot.
My advice to my fellow Americans is to Google “The American Constitution.” Make as many copies as your printers will bear. Bury some in the backyard. Pass this knowledge down throughout the generations so when the time comes, if we indeed have lost our guarantees given to us by G-d and certified by our founders, our children will have a blueprint of America.
If not us, our children must revive the dream that was once the United States of America.
(Dave Weinbaum is a regular contributor of one-liners and commentaries to many regional and national publications and web sites, including the Reader's Digest, National Enquirer and Forbes and is a regular pundit for the www.jewishworldreview.com. Readers can reach Dave at firstname.lastname@example.org or his website, www.daveweinbaum.com. Listen to the Dave Weinbaum Radio Talk show on KTTR 99.7 FM and 1490 AM on Friday mornings starting at 9:05.)
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